1
00:00:53,070 --> 00:00:55,060
[whimpering]

2
00:01:09,100 --> 00:01:12,080
[Jacqueline]
Santa Tomasina is a remote little village

3
00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:14,150
in the mountains
above San Juan.

4
00:01:17,150 --> 00:01:19,030
Its inhabitants,

5
00:01:19,030 --> 00:01:20,190
although a primitive lot,

6
00:01:20,190 --> 00:01:23,010
are prideful, stubborn,

7
00:01:23,010 --> 00:01:25,140
and occasionally quite crafty.

8
00:01:28,070 --> 00:01:30,230
[both]
Viva Santa Tomasina! Shh, shh.

9
00:01:30,230 --> 00:01:32,230
[all whispering]
Viva Santa Tomasina!

10
00:01:38,100 --> 00:01:41,220
♪ Oh, I got a mule,
her name is sal ♪

11
00:01:41,220 --> 00:01:44,040
♪ 15 miles
on the erie canal ♪

12
00:01:44,040 --> 00:01:45,080
♪ she's a good old worker ♪

13
00:01:45,080 --> 00:01:46,140
C'mon mule.

14
00:01:46,140 --> 00:01:47,210
♪ And a good old pal ♪

15
00:01:47,210 --> 00:01:49,130
♪ 15 miles
on the erie canal ♪

16
00:01:49,130 --> 00:01:51,030
[Jacqueline]
To reach Santa Tomasina,

17
00:01:51,030 --> 00:01:53,110
one must have stamina,
purpose,

18
00:01:53,110 --> 00:01:55,120
and just to be
on the safe side,

19
00:01:55,120 --> 00:01:57,140
an invitation.

20
00:01:57,140 --> 00:02:01,030
Sister Bertrille and I
left San Juan armed with all 3,

21
00:02:01,230 --> 00:02:04,130
or so we thought.

22
00:02:04,130 --> 00:02:07,050
♪ Low bridge,
everybody down ♪

23
00:02:07,050 --> 00:02:09,140
♪ low bridge
'cause we're coming to a... ♪

24
00:02:09,140 --> 00:02:11,020
C'mon, whoa.

25
00:02:12,110 --> 00:02:14,200
[donkey braying]
Whoa, whoa.

26
00:02:15,180 --> 00:02:16,230
[groans]

27
00:02:16,230 --> 00:02:18,190
Your turn to ride.

28
00:02:18,190 --> 00:02:20,150
Oh, that's Ok.
I'm not tired.

29
00:02:20,150 --> 00:02:22,020
No, you don't understand.

30
00:02:22,020 --> 00:02:24,170
I prefer to walk.

31
00:02:24,170 --> 00:02:27,230
You know, saint Theresa
wandered all over Spain in her bare feet.

32
00:02:27,230 --> 00:02:29,020
[groans]

33
00:02:29,020 --> 00:02:31,110
Now I know why
they made her a saint.

34
00:02:46,010 --> 00:02:47,100
[birds cawing]

35
00:02:50,110 --> 00:02:51,180
[birds chirping]

36
00:02:51,180 --> 00:02:53,060
Oh, well.

37
00:02:53,060 --> 00:02:55,200
Big welcoming committees
embarrass me anyway.

38
00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:57,200
How could they have
welcomed us?

39
00:02:57,200 --> 00:03:00,020
They didn't even know
when we were coming.

40
00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:03,010
Woo-hoo!
Anyone home?

41
00:03:07,010 --> 00:03:08,220
There's somebody.

42
00:03:08,220 --> 00:03:12,000
One of our future pupils
from the look of him.

43
00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:13,180
Hola, muchacho.

44
00:03:18,120 --> 00:03:20,130
[woman]
10 times a day...

45
00:03:20,130 --> 00:03:24,030
Papacito, there is
2 great birds at the edge of the village.

46
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[woman yelling]
Come see.

47
00:03:26,010 --> 00:03:29,110
Silencio, Juanito.
Do you not see that Señor Diego is hurt?

48
00:03:29,110 --> 00:03:32,200
But, papacito,
they are as big as you.

49
00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:34,200
Juanito, I told you...

50
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:39,080
Hello, uh,

51
00:03:39,080 --> 00:03:42,050
I'm Sister Bertrille
and this is Sister Jacqueline.

52
00:03:42,050 --> 00:03:43,160
Hello.

53
00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:47,170
We're from
the convent San Tanco in San Juan.

54
00:03:47,170 --> 00:03:50,040
Yes, we were invited here
by your headman,

55
00:03:50,040 --> 00:03:51,110
uh, Señor Caracol.

56
00:03:51,110 --> 00:03:52,210
[people chattering]
Pedro Caracol?

57
00:03:52,210 --> 00:03:54,190
You dare to mention
that name

58
00:03:54,190 --> 00:03:58,060
when my husband,
the fool that he is, is lying on the ground?

59
00:03:58,060 --> 00:04:00,020
I spit on Pedro Caracol.

60
00:04:00,020 --> 00:04:01,080
Quiet, woman.

61
00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:03,110
Can you not see
these are holy sisters?

62
00:04:03,110 --> 00:04:04,170
Go tend your husband.

63
00:04:06,110 --> 00:04:08,000
Forgive her.

64
00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:10,180
Her family have just suffered
a terrible loss.

65
00:04:11,210 --> 00:04:13,090
What do you wish with us?

66
00:04:13,090 --> 00:04:14,200
Is someone hurt?

67
00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:16,030
Perhaps I can help.

68
00:04:18,030 --> 00:04:21,110
Ah, the bump on his head
will heal without a nurse.

69
00:04:21,110 --> 00:04:23,120
But what of Gordo?

70
00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:25,220
How can we live
without Gordo?

71
00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:28,140
Who's Gordo?

72
00:04:28,140 --> 00:04:30,040
[crying]
Their pig.

73
00:04:30,040 --> 00:04:33,200
He was stolen about
an hour ago by Pedro Caracol,

74
00:04:33,200 --> 00:04:37,110
may he choke on the meat.

75
00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:38,230
I--I don't understand.

76
00:04:38,230 --> 00:04:41,230
I--I thought Pedro Caracol
was the head of this village.

77
00:04:41,230 --> 00:04:43,160
Isn't this Santa Tomasina?

78
00:04:50,230 --> 00:04:54,020
The other sister
will remain with Diego. You will come with us.

79
00:04:54,020 --> 00:04:56,050
Now, wait a minute.
If we're in the wrong place...

80
00:04:56,050 --> 00:04:57,200
[Francisco]
This way, sister.

81
00:04:59,170 --> 00:05:01,120
Onward and upward.

82
00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:03,040
[people muttering]

83
00:05:06,090 --> 00:05:07,210
[water running]

84
00:05:15,080 --> 00:05:18,200
The church
of the most holy patron of our village,

85
00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:21,040
Saint Tomasina.

86
00:05:22,090 --> 00:05:23,230
But, Señor--
Francisco.

87
00:05:23,230 --> 00:05:25,070
Ok, Francisco.

88
00:05:25,070 --> 00:05:26,190
I don't know
what's going on here,

89
00:05:26,190 --> 00:05:29,140
but about 3 weeks ago,
a man came to our convent.

90
00:05:29,140 --> 00:05:31,100
He said his name was
Pedro Caracol

91
00:05:31,100 --> 00:05:34,100
and that he was
the headman of the village of Santa Tomasina,

92
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:36,130
and he invited us
to spend a week there

93
00:05:36,130 --> 00:05:38,190
and tell his people
about our convent school.

94
00:05:38,190 --> 00:05:41,030
Now I understand.

95
00:05:41,030 --> 00:05:42,060
You do?

96
00:05:42,060 --> 00:05:44,030
It is a miracle.

97
00:05:44,030 --> 00:05:47,180
Our most holy patron
has guided your steps.

98
00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:50,120
Sister, if she had not been
watching over you,

99
00:05:50,120 --> 00:05:53,030
you would now be
in a nest of

100
00:05:53,030 --> 00:05:55,100
desperate banditos.

101
00:05:57,050 --> 00:05:59,160
Banditos?
In this day and age?

102
00:05:59,160 --> 00:06:00,190
[laughs]

103
00:06:00,190 --> 00:06:02,170
Well, that's just the point,
sister.

104
00:06:02,170 --> 00:06:05,060
You see, these people are
living in the last century.

105
00:06:05,060 --> 00:06:07,060
There's no electricity
or running water,

106
00:06:07,060 --> 00:06:11,020
and they live in constant fear
of being attacked by bandits like Pedro Caracol.

107
00:06:11,020 --> 00:06:13,070
Oh, Sister Bertrille,
we met him.

108
00:06:13,070 --> 00:06:15,120
Now, did he look like
a bandit to you?

109
00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:18,110
Well, he wasn't wearing
crossed bandileros, if that's what you mean.

110
00:06:18,110 --> 00:06:20,070
But Francisco told me
that Pedro and his men

111
00:06:20,070 --> 00:06:22,090
have been preying
on this village for years.

112
00:06:22,090 --> 00:06:25,210
Well, if Pedro Caracol
is a-- is a leader of a band of desperados,

113
00:06:25,210 --> 00:06:28,140
why did he invite us
to spend a week in his village?

114
00:06:28,140 --> 00:06:31,090
Maybe for the gifts
we'd bring, or the medical supplies,

115
00:06:31,090 --> 00:06:32,170
o-or the burros,

116
00:06:32,170 --> 00:06:34,120
or maybe to hold us
for ransom.

117
00:06:34,120 --> 00:06:36,210
Oh, if he wanted to lure us
to his village,

118
00:06:36,210 --> 00:06:39,100
why did he tell us
he was headman of Santa Tomasina

119
00:06:39,100 --> 00:06:40,220
and let us blunder in here?

120
00:06:40,220 --> 00:06:43,040
Well, remember that sign
down the trail? Yes.

121
00:06:43,040 --> 00:06:45,110
Well, Francisco told me
until this afternoon

122
00:06:45,110 --> 00:06:47,170
that sign pointed towards
Pedro's village.

123
00:06:47,170 --> 00:06:49,050
And Francisco
found out about it

124
00:06:49,050 --> 00:06:51,000
and switched it
just before we got here.

125
00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:52,210
It's kind of
a running battle they have.

126
00:06:52,210 --> 00:06:54,080
Well, that's fine.

127
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:56,020
Only, I still don't
believe it.

128
00:06:56,020 --> 00:06:58,060
Well, there's one way
to find out.

129
00:06:58,060 --> 00:07:00,070
I'm going to
Pedro Caracol's village.

130
00:07:00,070 --> 00:07:01,230
Sister Bertrille,

131
00:07:01,230 --> 00:07:03,220
this may come
as a shock to you,

132
00:07:03,220 --> 00:07:06,130
but you are a novice
at the convent San Tanco,

133
00:07:06,130 --> 00:07:08,150
not a battalion of Federales.

134
00:07:08,150 --> 00:07:11,010
But I have one thing
the Federales didn't have.

135
00:07:11,010 --> 00:07:12,060
What?
Air power.

136
00:07:13,070 --> 00:07:14,210
Oh.

137
00:07:14,210 --> 00:07:16,020
[sighs]
Oh.

138
00:07:18,110 --> 00:07:20,060
[crickets chirping]

139
00:07:22,070 --> 00:07:26,030
[man]
Francisco? Francisco, where are you?

140
00:07:26,030 --> 00:07:27,190
[men shouting]

141
00:07:29,120 --> 00:07:31,110
Sister,
you must remain inside.

142
00:07:31,110 --> 00:07:33,000
It is not safe outside.

143
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:35,030
Well, what is it?
What's happening? Who's here?

144
00:07:35,030 --> 00:07:38,090
Pedro Caracol and his men.
It is a raid.

145
00:07:38,090 --> 00:07:40,050
W-Where--where is
Sister Bertrille?

146
00:07:40,050 --> 00:07:41,210
Well, she--she went out.

147
00:07:41,210 --> 00:07:44,110
Out?
With those banditos around?

148
00:07:44,110 --> 00:07:46,070
[speaking Spanish]

149
00:07:46,070 --> 00:07:48,190
[man]
Francisco. They're attacking the church.

150
00:07:48,190 --> 00:07:51,180
The church? Villains!

151
00:07:51,180 --> 00:07:53,120
Do not worry about
Sister Bertrille.

152
00:07:53,120 --> 00:07:55,130
Santa Tomasina
will protect her.

153
00:07:57,030 --> 00:07:58,180
[Francisco]
Courage,

154
00:07:58,180 --> 00:08:00,190
men of Santa Tomasina,

155
00:08:00,190 --> 00:08:04,010
[men hollering]
Courage. I am coming.

156
00:08:05,010 --> 00:08:06,180
And I didn't believe it.

157
00:08:06,180 --> 00:08:08,040
[exclaims]

158
00:08:11,180 --> 00:08:13,210
I guess Francisco
was telling the truth.

159
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:16,020
[wind blowing]

160
00:08:23,180 --> 00:08:26,020
[man
She is right, Francisco. We are beaten.

161
00:08:26,020 --> 00:08:27,190
[man
How can we fight now?

162
00:08:27,190 --> 00:08:30,060
Now more than ever.

163
00:08:31,070 --> 00:08:34,000
For the honor of our village

164
00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:36,090
and for our holy saint.

165
00:08:37,220 --> 00:08:41,180
Mr. Diego,
how are you feeling?

166
00:08:41,180 --> 00:08:44,090
I thought your pig was stolen
this afternoon.

167
00:08:44,090 --> 00:08:46,050
[pig squealing]
Sister, we got him back.

168
00:08:46,050 --> 00:08:49,090
Yes, but there are 2 of them.
Where did he get the other one?

169
00:08:49,090 --> 00:08:52,100
Oh, thank heaven
you are all right.

170
00:08:52,100 --> 00:08:54,140
Sister Bertrille,
she's not yet returned?

171
00:08:54,140 --> 00:08:55,200
Uh, no, not yet.

172
00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:57,100
We--we will
pray for her safety.

173
00:08:57,100 --> 00:08:59,080
Uh--uh, yes. Thank you.

174
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:02,150
Uh, Señor Francisco,
where did this man get 2 pigs?

175
00:09:02,150 --> 00:09:04,110
Is it not wonderful?

176
00:09:05,030 --> 00:09:06,200
Early this evening,

177
00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:09,030
injured as he was,

178
00:09:09,030 --> 00:09:11,090
Diego risk his life

179
00:09:11,090 --> 00:09:15,210
to rescue his beloved Gordo
from those devils.

180
00:09:15,210 --> 00:09:18,230
Oh, yes, but where did he get
the other one?

181
00:09:18,230 --> 00:09:21,170
Francisco, how can you worry
about pigs now?

182
00:09:22,160 --> 00:09:24,230
She is right, sister.

183
00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:28,160
A terrible tragedy
has befallen our village.

184
00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:31,130
Oh, what happened?
Was someone hurt in the raid?

185
00:09:31,130 --> 00:09:34,140
Worse, sister, much worse.

186
00:09:34,140 --> 00:09:37,150
If you want to see
what villainy

187
00:09:37,150 --> 00:09:41,060
Pedro Caracol
and his criminals are capable of,

188
00:09:41,230 --> 00:09:43,080
come with me.

189
00:09:51,020 --> 00:09:52,220
[Francisco]
There.

190
00:09:52,220 --> 00:09:55,070
They have stolen
Saint Tomasina,

191
00:09:55,070 --> 00:09:57,140
the most holy patron
of our village.

192
00:09:57,140 --> 00:09:59,160
Oh, that's terrible.

193
00:09:59,160 --> 00:10:02,010
For longer than anyone
can remember,

194
00:10:02,010 --> 00:10:04,010
Saint Tomasina
was in this church.

195
00:10:04,010 --> 00:10:05,050
Oh.

196
00:10:05,050 --> 00:10:08,080
She is the symbol
of our village,

197
00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:12,030
of--of our
spiritual identity.

198
00:10:12,030 --> 00:10:14,120
Without her,
we are lost,

199
00:10:15,100 --> 00:10:17,080
we are beaten.

200
00:10:17,230 --> 00:10:19,040
Look!

201
00:10:25,050 --> 00:10:27,090
Uh-oh.
What are they doing up?

202
00:10:27,090 --> 00:10:29,160
It is a miracle.

203
00:10:29,160 --> 00:10:31,030
[all]
A miracle.

204
00:10:31,030 --> 00:10:33,100
Oh, no, hold on.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

205
00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:35,100
Uh, you've made a mistake.

206
00:10:35,100 --> 00:10:38,190
I hope they'll be able
to understand lift versus drag.

207
00:10:38,190 --> 00:10:40,180
Come, my friends,

208
00:10:40,180 --> 00:10:43,140
let us welcome
our beloved saint.

209
00:10:43,140 --> 00:10:47,200
By a miracle,
she has returned to us in bodily form.

210
00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:53,100
You must ask her
to forgive us for not having recognized her before.

211
00:10:53,100 --> 00:10:58,050
Saint Tomasina will lead us
against the enemy in person.

212
00:10:58,050 --> 00:11:00,100
Viva Saint Tomasina!

213
00:11:00,100 --> 00:11:02,230
[all chanting]
Viva Saint Tomasina!

214
00:11:04,090 --> 00:11:08,070
Viva Saint Tomasina!

215
00:11:09,140 --> 00:11:11,130
Viva Saint Tomasina!

216
00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:15,060
Oh, brother.

217
00:11:19,010 --> 00:11:20,160
[people chattering]

218
00:11:24,170 --> 00:11:26,000
Don't push, senoras.

219
00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:28,140
Everyone will get a chance
to see the saint.

220
00:11:28,140 --> 00:11:31,210
Well, how does it feel
to be a modern miracle?

221
00:11:31,210 --> 00:11:33,090
Awful.

222
00:11:33,090 --> 00:11:35,210
We've got to get out of here
so we can tell the authorities

223
00:11:35,210 --> 00:11:37,220
back in San Juan
about Pedro Caracol.

224
00:11:37,220 --> 00:11:39,120
Well,
I'm for the first part,

225
00:11:39,120 --> 00:11:41,050
but what are you
going to tell them?

226
00:11:41,050 --> 00:11:44,050
All you saw
was another village with everyone asleep.

227
00:11:44,050 --> 00:11:46,110
Well, banditos
have to sleep, too.

228
00:11:46,110 --> 00:11:49,070
And don't forget
about the new sign at the fork of the road

229
00:11:49,070 --> 00:11:51,120
conclusively pointing towards
Pedro's village.

230
00:11:51,120 --> 00:11:53,040
Well, what
does that prove?

231
00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:55,040
That Francisco
was telling the truth.

232
00:11:55,040 --> 00:11:56,140
Let's go.

233
00:11:56,140 --> 00:11:58,220
Sister, they think
you're their patron saint.

234
00:11:58,220 --> 00:12:00,200
You think they're going to
let you go?

235
00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:02,000
We can try.

236
00:12:03,220 --> 00:12:05,130
Where is the saint going?

237
00:12:05,130 --> 00:12:06,160
[pig grunts]

238
00:12:09,170 --> 00:12:13,050
Juanito, will you please
tell these people I am not a saint?

239
00:12:13,050 --> 00:12:15,140
Perhaps she is going to fly
to heaven

240
00:12:15,140 --> 00:12:18,150
to tell the angels
of the good people of our village.

241
00:12:18,150 --> 00:12:20,150
Not before
she blesses my pig.

242
00:12:20,150 --> 00:12:23,110
You want me to
bless your pig?

243
00:12:23,110 --> 00:12:27,210
Si, tell the saint that Gordo
is from this village,

244
00:12:27,210 --> 00:12:29,190
so he doesn't need
the blessing.

245
00:12:29,190 --> 00:12:33,000
But Francesca here
is a foreign pig.

246
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:35,010
[pig grunting]

247
00:12:35,010 --> 00:12:37,230
Well I'm-- I'm sorry,
but I can't bless your pig,

248
00:12:37,230 --> 00:12:39,170
I can't bless anything.

249
00:12:39,170 --> 00:12:41,070
Now, won't you please leave?

250
00:12:41,070 --> 00:12:42,200
You too, Juanito.

251
00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:45,010
She took valdez's mangoes.

252
00:12:45,010 --> 00:12:47,050
Why couldn't she
bless my pig now?

253
00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:50,140
The saint is very tired.

254
00:12:50,140 --> 00:12:53,160
We will come back later
for Francesca's blessing.

255
00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,080
[trumpet blows]

256
00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:57,120
What's that, another raid?

257
00:12:57,120 --> 00:12:58,220
Look, sister, look.

258
00:12:58,220 --> 00:13:01,030
It is the army
of Santa Tomasina.

259
00:13:08,050 --> 00:13:11,090
Diego, you're out of step.

260
00:13:11,090 --> 00:13:14,150
[Francisco]
Tally...ho!

261
00:13:15,230 --> 00:13:18,020
Left face!

262
00:13:25,090 --> 00:13:27,170
Inform the beloved saint

263
00:13:27,170 --> 00:13:30,190
her army is ready
for review.

264
00:13:31,090 --> 00:13:33,000
My army?

265
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,120
Francisco,
what are you talking about?

266
00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:38,160
Tell the beloved saint
we have waited too long for this day.

267
00:13:39,090 --> 00:13:40,190
For too long

268
00:13:40,190 --> 00:13:44,150
have the villains
and banditos of Pedro Caracol

269
00:13:44,150 --> 00:13:47,170
preyed upon our poor village.

270
00:13:47,170 --> 00:13:50,190
For too long
have we stood in fear of them.

271
00:13:50,190 --> 00:13:52,110
Now wait a minute, fellas...

272
00:13:52,110 --> 00:13:53,180
The blessing,

273
00:13:53,180 --> 00:13:55,090
we are ready for the blessing.

274
00:13:56,010 --> 00:13:58,080
We shall rise up

275
00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:00,190
in our holy armor,

276
00:14:00,190 --> 00:14:04,030
protected from our enemies,

277
00:14:04,030 --> 00:14:07,030
and with the holy saint
herself to lead us,

278
00:14:07,230 --> 00:14:10,080
we will destroy

279
00:14:10,080 --> 00:14:12,200
the army of Pedro Caracol.

280
00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:15,120
[all cheering]

281
00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:18,230
Goodbye, Saint Tomasina,
hello, Joan of arc.

282
00:14:18,230 --> 00:14:20,100
Not yet, not yet.

283
00:14:20,100 --> 00:14:22,110
We have not received
the blessing yet.

284
00:14:22,110 --> 00:14:23,190
And I'm not going to.

285
00:14:23,190 --> 00:14:25,080
I--I mean, she's not,

286
00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:27,220
I mean, I am Sister Bertrille
from the convent San Tanco

287
00:14:27,220 --> 00:14:29,130
and I can't bless anyone.

288
00:14:29,130 --> 00:14:31,020
You see, my people?

289
00:14:31,020 --> 00:14:33,040
How modest the saints are.

290
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:35,200
They do not know
their own holiness.

291
00:14:36,190 --> 00:14:37,230
Forget it, sister.

292
00:14:37,230 --> 00:14:40,030
He has an answer
for everything.

293
00:14:40,030 --> 00:14:41,080
Look,

294
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:42,210
even if I were
Saint Tomasina,

295
00:14:42,210 --> 00:14:44,200
I wouldn't lead you
into battle.

296
00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:47,030
Ask--ask the beloved saint
why not?

297
00:14:47,030 --> 00:14:49,130
Our--our cause is just.

298
00:14:49,130 --> 00:14:51,140
He wants to know--
I know. I heard him.

299
00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:53,120
Because, um,

300
00:14:53,120 --> 00:14:56,130
uh, because the saints
are people of peace.

301
00:14:56,130 --> 00:14:59,080
Oh, no, not--not
Saint Tomasina.

302
00:14:59,080 --> 00:15:01,230
She is a warrior saint.

303
00:15:03,070 --> 00:15:05,000
So much for that approach.

304
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:06,180
Uh, look,

305
00:15:06,180 --> 00:15:09,190
you say Pedro Caracol
and his men are banditos, right?

306
00:15:09,190 --> 00:15:11,000
Si.

307
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,050
Well, then they must be
well armed with guns.

308
00:15:13,050 --> 00:15:14,160
And there's only a few of you,

309
00:15:14,160 --> 00:15:16,010
and you've got nothing
but sticks,

310
00:15:16,010 --> 00:15:18,180
and--and--and shovels
and a few machetes.

311
00:15:18,180 --> 00:15:20,100
Why, you'd be clobbered.

312
00:15:20,100 --> 00:15:23,090
W--w--w--w--what--what
is this clobbered?

313
00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:24,170
Oh, beaten.

314
00:15:24,170 --> 00:15:25,210
Beaten?

315
00:15:27,030 --> 00:15:29,060
The--the men
of Santa Tomasina?

316
00:15:29,060 --> 00:15:30,230
Never.

317
00:15:30,230 --> 00:15:34,220
We are not afraid.
We are strong.

318
00:15:34,220 --> 00:15:38,130
And with Saint Tomasina
herself to lead us,

319
00:15:38,130 --> 00:15:42,030
we are invincible.

320
00:15:42,030 --> 00:15:43,120
[all cheering]

321
00:15:44,030 --> 00:15:45,150
[sighs]

322
00:15:45,150 --> 00:15:49,040
I am not Saint Tomasina.
I am Sister Bertrille.

323
00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:51,000
Now you've got to
believe me.

324
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,120
[men cheering]

325
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:57,090
All the women
are in the church,

326
00:15:57,090 --> 00:15:58,210
but I don't see
any of the men.

327
00:15:58,210 --> 00:16:00,220
They're probably holding
a council of war.

328
00:16:00,220 --> 00:16:03,210
Trying to figure out
how to convince you to play Joan of arc.

329
00:16:03,210 --> 00:16:05,180
Listen, let's go
while the getting's good.

330
00:16:05,180 --> 00:16:07,160
I don't know.
I suppose it's silly,

331
00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:11,030
but, I feel kind of guilty,
like I'm deserting them.

332
00:16:11,030 --> 00:16:14,110
Sister, on the way home
I want you to repeat to yourself,

333
00:16:14,110 --> 00:16:17,130
"I am not Saint Tomasina,
I am not Saint Tomasina,

334
00:16:17,130 --> 00:16:18,190
I am not saint--"

335
00:16:18,190 --> 00:16:20,140
I know who I am.

336
00:16:20,140 --> 00:16:23,110
I just wish
I could convince them before we left.

337
00:16:23,110 --> 00:16:26,080
Well, you could agree
to lead them against Pedro Caracol.

338
00:16:26,080 --> 00:16:27,230
And then,
after you got shot,

339
00:16:27,230 --> 00:16:29,180
they'd see that
you're not immortal.

340
00:16:29,180 --> 00:16:32,080
On the other hand,
a more positive course of action would be

341
00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:35,060
to tell the authorities
back in San Juan what's been going on around here

342
00:16:35,060 --> 00:16:36,130
and let them
straighten it out.

343
00:16:36,130 --> 00:16:37,200
Good thinking.

344
00:16:46,060 --> 00:16:47,090
Sister?

345
00:16:47,090 --> 00:16:48,150
[both gasping]

346
00:16:48,150 --> 00:16:50,230
Juanito,
what are you doing here?

347
00:16:50,230 --> 00:16:53,040
Is the beloved saint
going to battle?

348
00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:54,120
I knew she would.

349
00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:55,160
Battle?

350
00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:57,080
What battle?
Where are the men?

351
00:16:57,080 --> 00:16:59,120
They have gone
to attack Pedro Caracol.

352
00:16:59,120 --> 00:17:01,030
They went off
without the saint?

353
00:17:01,030 --> 00:17:03,060
I--I mean,
Sister Bertrille?

354
00:17:03,060 --> 00:17:07,050
Si. Señor Diego said
that if the saint said no,

355
00:17:07,050 --> 00:17:10,180
that they should not disobey,
but Señor Francisco said

356
00:17:10,180 --> 00:17:14,200
that what the saint meant
was for them to prove themselves worthy of her.

357
00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:16,190
He's a slippery one,
that Francisco.

358
00:17:16,190 --> 00:17:19,020
So, they are going to win
a great victory,

359
00:17:19,020 --> 00:17:22,090
and the saint will be pleased.
Won't you?

360
00:17:22,090 --> 00:17:24,070
Juanito, when
did they leave?

361
00:17:24,070 --> 00:17:25,200
A little while ago.

362
00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:27,180
They're going to attack
at sundown.

363
00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:29,040
Well, where? Which way?

364
00:17:29,040 --> 00:17:31,040
At the fork of the trail.

365
00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:33,040
Are you going to help them?

366
00:17:33,040 --> 00:17:34,200
I'm gonna stop them.

367
00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:36,130
Why doesn't she fly?

368
00:17:36,130 --> 00:17:38,060
Uh, no wind.

369
00:17:38,060 --> 00:17:40,150
Uh, sister,
wait for your high priestess.

370
00:17:43,170 --> 00:17:45,020
[Jacqueline gasping]

371
00:17:46,110 --> 00:17:48,200
What--what does that mean?

372
00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:51,060
I don't know.
There was only one here last night.

373
00:17:51,060 --> 00:17:52,190
Where is that army?

374
00:17:54,060 --> 00:17:56,030
Men of Santa Tomasina.

375
00:17:56,030 --> 00:17:58,210
Our beloved saint
has come herself to lead us. Look!

376
00:17:58,210 --> 00:18:01,080
[all cheering]

377
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:03,040
[Bertrille]
Stop, stop.

378
00:18:04,060 --> 00:18:05,130
Whoa!

379
00:18:05,130 --> 00:18:08,130
You've all got to go back
before you get hurt.

380
00:18:08,130 --> 00:18:10,170
Tell the beloved saint
it is too late.

381
00:18:10,170 --> 00:18:12,200
The enemy is upon us.
Look.

382
00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:14,040
[gasping]

383
00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:20,080
That's the enemy?

384
00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:23,000
The villains that have been
preying on your village?

385
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,170
The--the banditos?

386
00:18:24,170 --> 00:18:26,040
[Francisco]
Si.

387
00:18:26,040 --> 00:18:28,150
They are
desperate criminals,

388
00:18:28,150 --> 00:18:30,070
every one of them.

389
00:18:30,070 --> 00:18:33,070
But they're just villagers
like you.

390
00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:34,180
Francisco,

391
00:18:35,110 --> 00:18:38,180
give us back our nuns.

392
00:18:38,180 --> 00:18:41,010
They are not nuns.

393
00:18:41,010 --> 00:18:43,030
This is
the holy Saint Tomasina

394
00:18:43,030 --> 00:18:45,000
sent to us by a miracle.

395
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:48,160
They are nuns
from convent San Tanco,

396
00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:50,210
and they were sent to us.

397
00:18:50,210 --> 00:18:53,100
You kidnapped them.

398
00:18:53,100 --> 00:18:57,030
Liar.
She descended from the sky.

399
00:18:57,030 --> 00:18:59,230
And who are you
to talk about kidnapping,

400
00:18:59,230 --> 00:19:02,110
you who would steal
a man's pig?

401
00:19:02,110 --> 00:19:06,060
I sp-spit on your pig.

402
00:19:06,060 --> 00:19:09,160
If--if we stole him,

403
00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:11,080
where is he now?

404
00:19:11,080 --> 00:19:14,170
And where is the pig
you--you stole from us?

405
00:19:14,170 --> 00:19:16,000
[Francisco]
Hypocrite!

406
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,170
Well, your saintliness,
what do you think now?

407
00:19:17,170 --> 00:19:19,010
I suppose
you did not steal our beloved statue?

408
00:19:19,010 --> 00:19:20,120
I think we've been conned.
Mmm-hmm.

409
00:19:20,120 --> 00:19:22,040
But by whom?

410
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:24,070
Statue?

411
00:19:24,070 --> 00:19:27,110
Saint Tomasina has belonged
to our village

412
00:19:27,110 --> 00:19:31,160
for hundreds of years,
and years, and years.

413
00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:33,090
Uh, Señor Caracol--

414
00:19:33,090 --> 00:19:37,100
it is good--good to see you
unharmed, sisters.

415
00:19:37,100 --> 00:19:40,060
But if you value your safety,

416
00:19:40,060 --> 00:19:43,010
come over to this side
of the trail.

417
00:19:43,010 --> 00:19:44,230
Oh, you have been tricked

418
00:19:44,230 --> 00:19:47,020
into a nest of
desperate banditos.

419
00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:49,040
[speaking Spanish]

420
00:19:50,160 --> 00:19:54,100
They have been assaulting
our poor village

421
00:19:54,100 --> 00:19:56,050
for years.

422
00:19:56,050 --> 00:19:58,190
I seem to have heard that
somewhere before.

423
00:19:58,190 --> 00:20:01,080
Unspeakable villain.

424
00:20:01,080 --> 00:20:04,060
It is you
who are the banditos.

425
00:20:04,060 --> 00:20:07,020
Señor Caracol,
what's the name of your village?

426
00:20:07,020 --> 00:20:09,230
Oh, Santa Tomasina,
after the holy saint.

427
00:20:09,230 --> 00:20:12,010
[Francisco]
Treachery.

428
00:20:12,010 --> 00:20:14,200
You have no right
to that name. It is ours.

429
00:20:19,060 --> 00:20:20,210
There.

430
00:20:20,210 --> 00:20:23,070
That is what
we of Santa Tomasina think of thieves.

431
00:20:34,110 --> 00:20:38,120
And that's what
we of Santa Tomasina think of liars.

432
00:20:38,120 --> 00:20:40,110
[Francisco]
Enough.

433
00:20:40,110 --> 00:20:43,090
We will settle this
once and for all.

434
00:20:52,190 --> 00:20:55,000
[Francisco]
For Santa Tomasina,

435
00:20:56,060 --> 00:20:58,120
charge!

436
00:21:01,180 --> 00:21:04,010
What are you waiting for?

437
00:21:04,010 --> 00:21:06,140
The holy saint herself
is here to lead us.

438
00:21:06,140 --> 00:21:07,230
[men cheering]

439
00:21:08,140 --> 00:21:10,090
Oh, no, you don't.

440
00:21:10,090 --> 00:21:13,090
Look...
Oh, you see, my people.

441
00:21:13,090 --> 00:21:16,000
The holy saint sees
whose cause is just.

442
00:21:17,060 --> 00:21:18,230
Charge!

443
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:24,110
[Bertrille screams]

444
00:21:25,160 --> 00:21:27,100
[all shouting]

445
00:21:38,230 --> 00:21:40,200
Everybody, listen to me!

446
00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:42,120
Ooh, this is awful.

447
00:21:47,190 --> 00:21:49,110
Now, stop it.

448
00:21:49,110 --> 00:21:51,080
Oh, it's too late.
It would take the wisdom of Solomon

449
00:21:51,080 --> 00:21:52,180
to stop them now.
But they're liable to

450
00:21:52,180 --> 00:21:54,110
kill each other.

451
00:21:55,020 --> 00:21:56,050
Solomon?

452
00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:58,130
It's worth a try.
What?

453
00:21:58,130 --> 00:21:59,170
I...

454
00:22:01,220 --> 00:22:03,050
Excuse me.

455
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,070
[all shouting]

456
00:22:09,190 --> 00:22:11,050
♪[blowing trumpet]

457
00:22:14,100 --> 00:22:16,080
All right now.
Everybody at ease.

458
00:22:17,070 --> 00:22:18,230
Now, listen to me, will you?

459
00:22:18,230 --> 00:22:21,110
I think I have a solution
to your problem.

460
00:22:21,110 --> 00:22:23,190
Now,

461
00:22:23,190 --> 00:22:27,190
you say each of your villages
are entitled to the name of Santa Tomasina, right?

462
00:22:27,190 --> 00:22:29,110
[all]
Si.

463
00:22:29,110 --> 00:22:31,140
And this statue here
is the symbol of Santa Tomasina.

464
00:22:31,140 --> 00:22:32,160
[all]
Si. All right.

465
00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:34,050
There's a simple solution.

466
00:22:34,050 --> 00:22:36,010
I'll just slice the statue
in half

467
00:22:36,010 --> 00:22:37,230
and each of you
can have part of her.

468
00:22:37,230 --> 00:22:39,070
[all]
No, no, no.

469
00:22:39,070 --> 00:22:41,080
[Francisco]
Oh, no, no.

470
00:22:41,080 --> 00:22:44,090
This is-- you--you
would not destroy

471
00:22:44,090 --> 00:22:46,000
the holy image, would you?

472
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:47,180
That would be
a terrible sin.

473
00:22:47,180 --> 00:22:50,170
Is it any less of a sin
to go around breaking each other's heads?

474
00:22:50,170 --> 00:22:52,140
Ok. Ok.

475
00:22:52,140 --> 00:22:54,120
You don't want me
to cut the statue in half,

476
00:22:54,120 --> 00:22:57,070
but neither of you is willing
for the other one to have it,

477
00:22:57,070 --> 00:22:59,030
so what are you guys
going to do?

478
00:22:59,030 --> 00:23:00,140
[Bertrille]
I've got a solution.

479
00:23:00,140 --> 00:23:01,140
Now,

480
00:23:01,140 --> 00:23:02,170
[clears throat]

481
00:23:02,170 --> 00:23:05,100
What if we take her...

482
00:23:08,110 --> 00:23:10,190
We'll put the statue
right here

483
00:23:10,190 --> 00:23:13,220
as a symbol of--of
eternal peace between--

484
00:23:13,220 --> 00:23:16,070
uh, oh, excuse me.

485
00:23:17,230 --> 00:23:19,210
[grunting]

486
00:23:19,210 --> 00:23:22,130
Between east Santa Tomasina

487
00:23:22,130 --> 00:23:24,000
and, uh,

488
00:23:25,090 --> 00:23:27,070
and between

489
00:23:29,190 --> 00:23:31,230
west Santa Tomasina.

490
00:23:35,060 --> 00:23:38,190
Viva west Santa Tomasina!

491
00:23:38,190 --> 00:23:41,030
[all]
Viva west Santa Tomasina!

492
00:23:41,030 --> 00:23:43,220
Viva east Santa Tomasina!

493
00:23:43,220 --> 00:23:46,090
[all]
Viva east Santa Tomasina!

494
00:23:46,090 --> 00:23:48,180
[all]
Viva! Viva!

495
00:23:48,180 --> 00:23:49,210
Viva!

496
00:23:52,120 --> 00:23:54,020
[people chattering]

497
00:23:55,220 --> 00:23:57,020
[sighs]

498
00:23:57,020 --> 00:23:59,230
Peace, it's wonderful.

499
00:23:59,230 --> 00:24:05,100
Sisters, Pedro Caracol
has told us of his visit to your convent.

500
00:24:05,100 --> 00:24:08,130
I hope we have not
committed blasphemy

501
00:24:08,130 --> 00:24:11,000
in thinking you were
our beloved saint.

502
00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:13,040
Well, let's just call it
a mistake.

503
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,200
A lulu, but a mistake
nonetheless.

504
00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:18,000
Now, you will come with us
to our village

505
00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:20,010
and help us to celebrate
the eternal peace

506
00:24:20,010 --> 00:24:21,150
between our 2 villages?

507
00:24:21,150 --> 00:24:24,180
N-No, uh, the sisters
will come to our village

508
00:24:24,180 --> 00:24:27,230
to celebrate
our eternal peace.

509
00:24:27,230 --> 00:24:31,020
Now, Pedro, you-you're
starting up with your old tricks again.

510
00:24:31,020 --> 00:24:32,220
Our old tricks?

511
00:24:32,220 --> 00:24:36,030
We did not kidnap the sisters.

512
00:24:36,030 --> 00:24:37,190
You did.

513
00:24:37,190 --> 00:24:40,060
[Francisco]
Men of east Santa Tomasina,

514
00:24:41,150 --> 00:24:44,160
west Santa Tomasina
is trying to kidnap

515
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:46,040
our holy sisters.

516
00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:47,170
All right, you guys.

517
00:24:47,170 --> 00:24:49,000
[Francisco]
No, sister.

518
00:24:49,000 --> 00:24:51,130
[all]
No, no, no!

519
00:24:51,130 --> 00:24:54,100
You--you may go
wherever you wish.

520
00:24:54,100 --> 00:24:56,030
Wherever we wish?

521
00:24:56,030 --> 00:24:57,140
Where do we wish?

522
00:24:57,140 --> 00:24:58,220
Home.

523
00:25:01,070 --> 00:25:02,150
Goodbye.
Goodbye.

524
00:25:02,150 --> 00:25:04,040
[all]
Bye, goodbye. Nice seeeing you.

525
00:25:04,040 --> 00:25:06,020
Goodbye.
Bye.

526
00:25:07,100 --> 00:25:09,090
Men of east Santa Tomasina,

527
00:25:09,090 --> 00:25:12,050
we will see the holy sisters
back to their convent.

528
00:25:12,050 --> 00:25:13,080
[all]
No, no!

529
00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:15,090
No. We will accompany them.

530
00:26:02,530 --> 00:26:04,530
[end credits]

531
00:26:04,580 --> 00:26:09,130
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